K.M. Minemier & Associates is a certified Woman Owned Small Business (WOSB) engaged in full service real estate asset management and marketing.

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SO YOU WANT TO LIST YOUR HOME! HUMOR ONLY!

November 17, 2017

So you have decided you want to list your home for sale.  Better Than Great Job!!  Now What?  This is supposed to be humorous, no fair taking offense fellow agents.

First, research and make sure you are getting an agent who has actually listed and successfully sold homes that were not relatives or friends. 

Second, ask to meet with them and you ask them questions.  Don’t let them run the meeting.  They are going to try to dazzle you with all their pretty reports and graphs showing what they think your home is worth.  Instead, you ask them the questions –

  • Ask to see their MLS stats for at least the last 10 years.  This way you can tell they didn’t just start in the business and all their family supported them with their home selling and buying.  After 10 years they should be established enough to be able to sell your home!
  • Ask to see their phone – look at the missed calls.  Does it look like they have returned any of those calls within 3-4 hours?
  • So, you’ve checked out the calls, now check their texts to see if they have even answered any of the texts that were sent to them.
  • Well, you really shouldn’t check their emails, those are really private things these days.
  • BUT, you should check out their pictures.  Start with the latest ones first.  See what kind of person they are by the photos they take. 

OK, you like the stats and they have passed the phone check, now what?

Third, ask to see their car.  WHAT?  WHY?  Because if it is a nice clean car, then they actually take clients out in that vehicle and try to sell them a home.  Hopefully yours!!!  If it is not a clean car….. well, need I say more?  Do you really want them in your home when you are not there?

Fourth, oh great, they have passed the stats, the phone and the car.  Now what? 

  • Ask them to bake you cookies or cupcakes
  • Give those items a good taste test.  They gotta be great cooks to have successful open houses!

Fifth – so the cookies are out of this world.  Now ask to see their marketing plan.  If it is more than three pages, tell them thank you and you will be in touch!   It shouldn’t take more than one or two pages to list what they are going to do for you.  12 point fonts are usually large enough and they don’t need to embellish them with huge fonts, graphs, photos, etc. to make it seem like they know and do so much.  Just the facts please!!  It all boils down to just a few true steps to market a home!!

  • They show you a price they feel your home will sell for with three solds and three active comps to justify their findings.
  • You sign the listing
  • They put the sign in the yard – don’t let them fool you into doing it yourself, they use all sort of excuses (just had my nails done, my shoes will get dirty, I don’t have a sledge hammer – the list goes on and on)
  • They put an ELECTRONIC lockbox on your front door, not a cheap combo one that is easily broken into. And they send you a list of how many showings each week off that contraption.
  • They should print out some brochures – not the black and white cheapies but full color 8.5 x 11 glossy ones that would make Arlo Guthrie proud!
  • They put it in the MLS that same day – that syncs it out to hundreds of websites. – Make sure they are doing it themselves as the assistant back at the office never was at your home and doesn’t know what it looks like so how can they write about it and make sure it is accurate.
  • You make sure it is showing prominently on their website
  • They send out some mailers – not just one time, but at least every month and include you in the bulk mailings.
  • They have an open house every week til it sells or better yet, if it is vacant, they work out of that location until it sells with Open House Signs and Agent On Duty Signs in the front yard. 
  • You supply them with electric, bathroom and internet while they are there so they can work hard to sell your home.
  • They should be doing all sorts of social media postings about your home and the neighborhood and all the fun things to do around there.
  • They should be doing drone fly overs to enhance and include with the professional photographs they had taken.
  • They should be having the producer set up a convenient time for you, for the actors and movie crew to show up to do a live video feed promoting your home.
  • They should come to your home when they have an offer, bring you coffee and cookies and sit down and go over that offer in detail with you
  • They should ……..  OMG this list is getting to long and I Have to get this blog in.  I’m already a day late!!!

Hope you are ready for me to sell your home!!!  Give me a call and I might show up on time!


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